I was flipping through a notebook and was reminded…
Speaking to the Lord is sometimes hard, isn’t it? Well, it’s not actually hard, we make it hard, maybe. Oh sure, it’s easy to speak to the Lord when we’re in need, when we want something, kind of like the Wish Doll from the gumball machine, right? But I don’t think we (specifically I) truly understand the enormity of prayer. Oh sure I pray, but am I effectively communicating with God? The enormity of the Lord is indescribable, uncontainable, we cannot take Him lightly.
At the beginning of 2021, yes 2021, I committed to unpackaging a little bit further my relationship with God. You know, take those steps to remove the bow, open the box, delve inside a little deeper, pick up the gift and put it to use. I got this notebook and I started writing down questions that came to me as I read. I wanted to poke myself with questions that would make me think – not just surface work and a bless your heart, but questions that would cause me to grow in Him and that could only be answered by cozying up to Him. You know, questions that would actually change me (geez, what a slow process). So, I started writing down these probing questions and then I started writing down prayers. The questions and prayers may have been prompted by a verse I read or something I saw.
I’ve never written down prayers before I just always prayed off the cuff. Sometimes rambling, over wordy (ahem), distracted, empty (admittedly) prayers, other times meaningful, growing, connecting, Spirit among us prayers. Writing down prayers can be profound. There’s something about seeing the words on paper that make you look at them differently, they somehow have a different impact.
I worked on this project until about April 2021 and I could use a reset, so here we are. From January to April my focus changed, it evolved, ever so slowly, not because of Him, but because of me. After a time, the Lord brought other things to my mind and I was able to pour those out to Him. Eventually those prayers evolved into prayers for the ones I love that don’t know Him. We all know folks who don’t know Jesus. Scripture and prayer can change the world, but not if we don’t use it. I pray you are encouraged to dig deeper, write the Word out, write your Prayer out.
January 1, 2021
Do I have a teachable spirit? Am I eager to be changed? Do I cling to my old ways forsaking His newness in me? Do I have an open mind? Am I willing for my mind to be renewed?
-So many probing questions when just one would take a lifetime to answer.
Thank you Lord for bringing these questions to mind! Thank you Lord for guiding my journey! Thank you Lord for your transformative power! Thank you Lord for having a steady infinite attention span! Thank you for so completely understanding me – I don’t even understand myself, but I will trust in the plans you have for me.
Thank you Lord for the questions and the answers. Teach me! Change me! Open my Mind! Amen.
O Lord, you have examined my heart
And know everything about me.
Psalm 139:1